I came on here to write a blog post. But... I didn't know what to write about. I could give you an update on my life, but I'll tell you it's not very exciting. 

Um... I'm up in the mountains right now at a friend's mountain home. It is beautiful, indeed. Our friends have no WiFi so at the moment I am temporarily "borrowing" someone else's. Whoever you are, I appreciate you not protecting your WiFi. It helps me connect to the outside world. Anyway, other than that, there isn't much to tell. Um... Oh, good news: I am perfectly and amazingly happy just being Dude's friend. He's a great friend, he's easy to talk to, and hey, I get some laughs out of it. I am just fine listening to him tell me how much he likes his girl. I find it cute and I'm glad for her. She has a pretty awesome guy totally wrapped around her finger. Hahaha :) I have a new sense of purpose and direction. I know what I want to accomplish in my life and now I have to take all the baby steps to get there.

What do I want to accomplish, you may ask? Spreading God's word in foreign countries. I want to go and interact with the people, love on them. There is a notable lack of love in this world. It seems quite obvious (perhaps a bit too obvious) that the greed and bitterness of this world, at times overrules the love and joy. I just want to give people hope, because without hope, you have nothing. God is hope and God is love. Spreading God will spread life and in that, some of the dead people of this world will finally start living.

Anyway, getting back on my original train of thought..... you know, I can never, ever spell the word "original". Don't ask me why. I mean, it's spelled like it sounds but I always want to spell it "origonal" or something odd like that. It's very strange to me. Oh well...

As you may see, I am a bit at loss for words. I don't really know what to talk about. I guess I really should go to bed now because it is well past midnight and I am exhausted. Goodnight, all! Sweet dreams.

With love for Him.

Yours truly,

SD

Work to be done

(Yes this is my second post today)

BIG news! You remember Invisible Children, correct? Good! Cause this news has everything to do with them! They are offering an all expense paid trip to northern Uganda to anyone who can either

1.) have the most creative fundraiser idea

2.) raise the most money in your region

3.) raise $20,000

And I can get this mission club at my school involved and I can get my church involved and with my friends in all kinds of places, this could be BIG! I'm talking about a fundraiser, that is. My friend and I are going to make this happen. One huge, amazing fundraiser for the community. It will take WORK and TONS of planning but we are up to it. And the best part is, there's no way to fail! We may go to Uganda with our creative idea (if God wants us to) and if not, then we still had a blast and raised a bunch of money for a great cause. I can't lose! It's a win-win situation. God holds the key to my future, I'm just acting in the now. I'm telling you, we are on the verge of something big. God has amazing plans for 2011. God is moving. He is stirring. Oh, He is not distant! He is very much near and alive, working all over the world, setting things up perfectly according to His plan. The timing will be perfect, things will happen. I can feel everything shifting. Something is happening. We will be used in great things. And we have no reason to fear the future. He is already there. 

I am getting dizzy from everything speeding through my head. Plans. I need to do this, mention that. That is due Thursday, can I make it to church Wednesday? I just need to slow down. This is on God's timetable, not mine. Relax, Sarah. If it's God's will then it will happen. It is His doing. He can handle it. You can't plan everything tonight. Don't let the devil play tricks on your mind. This is nothing scary or wrong. It is magical. God will be working. Be at peace, child. I am here, I will take care of it. Do not worry, my love. Just rest tonight. And whatever you do, do to glorify Me.

With awestruck love for Him.

Yours truly,

SD

Wet

The rain it drizzles but does not fall,

I'll lie on the sidewalk feeling small.

I'll sit and wait till I'm drenched like the ground,

And lay there wet, until I feel like I've drowned.

Thoughts will come and crowd my mind,

I'll sort them out till they're all defined.

Some may hurt, others might heal,

But no tears will come, no matter how I feel.

Some call me strong, but that's not me.

I just give it to God and the feelings leave me be.

Don't patronize me, don't assume I'm upset.

Don't focus on me, there's no need to fret!

Move on with your lives, forgive and forget.

I'll catch up with you, even if I'm wet.

The steps of starting over

I am not upset, I just need some time to sort out thoughts and resolve everything. So these are somethings I need to do. 

First of all, I need to...

 

And then, once I have done that and accepted it, it's time to get this frame of mind on:

I need to remember that life is an adventure and God has AMAZING things in store for me. I have a purpose and a calling and I will go to places I would never have imagined. I am looking forward to giving my heart (including the "boy-love" part of my life). I feel the need to surrender to Him completely. Open up, stretch my arms wide and let Him wipe me clean. He will dry my last tear and send me on my mission with a promise and a hope. 

There is another concept that has recently enraptured me. Hope. There is always hope. God is my hope. He holds my future. Hope. Hope. Hope. There is hope. Hope is here. Hope leads me on. Without hope, there is no life. Hope ratifies my survival. Hope is key. Hope is vital. 

 

And for some motivation:

 

With love for Him.

Yours truly,

SD

It's done.

Well. It's over. Don't worry, you won't be hearing any more long, sappy, stupid blog posts about my love or Dude. He likes someone else, and that's fine. I'm glad for him, and for her. She is so very lucky. I had my hopes set high for a stupid dream. I understand. I'm not upset as long as I don't think about it. I really am glad for him. Because I know she likes him too. They will be great with each other. Now I can move on. I am free from those "binds" as was mentioned in my last poem. I am free to give all of my love to God. Now I can live for God and be totally and utterly satisfied with Him only. I am relieved. As long as I stay away from anything having to do with green tea, Owl City, or dreams. And as long as I avoid anything about him on Facebook. I'm good. Really. It's done and over with. Time to move on. 

With love for Him.

Yours truly,

SD

Swim

I really like this song. It's like my current favorite. It's so motivating and gives you such hope. I can relate to some of the lyrics well. I love this song and it keeps me positive and lets me enjoy the work involved with life. Life has been an interesting concept to me, lately. Have you ever been in one of those moods where you such sit there and wonder and think for a long time, almost wistfully? Yeah, I get like that alot lately. Not in a bad way. In fact, I rather like it. 

But yeah, life. Life as we know it. Life in America, life in other countries, survival. Do we live to survive? No, we live please ourselves. Others live to survive. Humans. Humans can be so cold, so selfish. How can one human being have the knowledge that another is starving to death and not even care? We see pictures of starving children in places like Africa and it bothers us. Why? Why does it bother us? It is because it makes us feel guilty? Or do we know that it's wrong and that we can do something about it? And then back to life. Life is precious. We all deserve death yet God has given us life. Breathing, existing, growing. It's all a miracle. Our bodies are magical, functioning vessels that carry our souls. And life is hard. It takes its toll on our bodies and spirits. But you can't lose hope. No. You can't. Just keep going. God is your hope. Always and forever, He is with you. He is what holds you together. He is who formed your body and made sure it works properly. He is the one who came up with every tiny detail that makes up the human body. And we've abused these holy vessels. Some people smoke and drink too much and it hurts us. People doing drugs, people who overeat, and people who starve themselves. It's like no one realizes what a miracle life is. I mean I know I've really gotten off track here, but this is what I think about sometimes...

With love for Him.

Yours truly,

SD

When I see your eyes

Today brought emotions and tumult inside me,

You brought be happiness, I thought you were the key,

I had my thoughts set, my mind was resolved,

But now it's all gone, my security dissolved.

Now all is unstable, is it even worth a fight?

What am I feeling when I think of you at night?

I need to give up, I'm chasing a dream,

But I can't let go! You're my steady beam.

I am bound by my love, yet betrayed by my mind,

Will it ever be gone, will I be freed from this bind?

I just wish it was simple, straight-forward and candid,

I wish I could know so I'm not left here stranded.

I'm so far away from where you are,

What's happening in that place that's so afar?

I just wish you'd know that you are loved!

I appreciate everything about you, my beloved.

I'd do anything to see you smile,

If it'd make you happy, I'd swim the Nile.

As long as your content, I'll be fine,

I just want you happy, you don't have to be mine.

I'll bear the heartache and face the pain,

If it's another girl that in your heart reigns.

I just have this love that I can't deny!

It screams inside, can you hear its cry?

Day after day, night after night, it yearns and longs and dreams for you,

I am alone in my feelings, they're my only crew.

No matter how long the poem, or how long the ballad,

Nothing will express my true love that's valid.

The words will keep running, like a stream that never dries,

How do I describe how my heart stops when I see your eyes?

When I see your eyes...